Tuesday, 11 August 2015

My partner

My partners out look on bipolar

My partner name is Jamie. He took some time out with me to explain what it’s like being in a relationship with a bipolar suffer.

I suppose it was him who helped me get diagnosed. Something made me look it up. I read it all to him and he said there isn’t one thing there you aren’t.

I suppose I took that quite hard at first, because if you are honest the way they write symptoms of bipolar isn’t most positive is it?

The one thing they do write that tends to bother me is the percentage in which bipolar sufferers commit suicide because of this illness. Yes i know it’s a very serious mental illness but do they really need to write that?
That’s massive. Most people that look bipolar up either think they suffer, they do suffer or they know someone who suffers.

I understand the awareness point of view, but I think that worries people sick. Every time a bipolar sufferer goes into an episode, everyone around them may think that? Do people really need to have that added on top?

That's one thing about bipolar that bothers my partner now, he is always on edge when I get ill, because of reading that.

I mentioned I took the symptoms of bipolar quite hard but this how Jamie perceived that to me to make me feel better

I will name a couple;

  • Eggshells

He explains living with someone that sufferers bipolar as, you are walking on eggshells, a lot of the time.
You never know if something you say will be wrong and change that person's mood in an instant.

He finds that part difficult. He explains it as one day he could say something to me, the next day the similar kind of thing could be said and I react completely different to it.

He feels he has to think about it more before he speaks Then you would to the “classed normal” person.

  • Unpredictable

My partner explains this as even from the moment I wake up he never knows what mood i’m going to be. It's not until I say my first sentence, he know what kind of day he could be in for.
I am definitely not a morning person and I can shout over simple things, Jamie normally says “ Go back to bed ”.

He says

“ If you are left alone for a good half hour after you wake, you am more settled in my moods throughout the day. If not you can be in a mood for half a day easy, Over someone just talking to you ”.

Jamie says I do unpredictable things and act on impulse a lot of the time, which can make life a bit chaotic. I could wake up and just say we are going out, no planning nothing just leave the house. With four children under 5, he believes you need to plan.

I never really plan anything, my actions are a lot on impulse. If I do plan things my mind could change next day, so I tend not to bother.

  • Impulsive.

He explains that I can live so much on impulse and never think of the consequence after. What he means is like when I think I don’t need him when I’m manic. When I ask him to leave, Then come back. He says I don’t think far ahead of a couple days later when I want him to come home.

He says

“ That bothers me because I am just expected to come home there and then regardless of what you have done ”.

I can understand his point here completely but I’m not very well when I do this so no I don’t think about consequences.

  • Several different people

Jamie explains this one as a positive. He likes the fact I’m several different people. He never gets bored of our relationship because of this. He finds it keeps it fresh.

He says

“I dont just have a relationship with one girl I have 6. If I takes a little bit from each person, I have the perfect girlfriend”.

  • Living on the edge

Jamie says he likes this part to me also. I can be very fun, just straight out silly.

He says

“ It keeps our relationship exciting as well as our lives ”.Not even the unpredictable and impulsiveness is all bad .

He likes some of it. Like when I just go buy him something for nothing (the last was an i pad). When I’ll book a holiday and leave within a couple of days.

He says there are quite a few positive things about being in a relationship with a bipolar sufferer but there are also bad.

  • Depression

Jamie doesn’t like the depression side of things, this is where he notices the most that I’m not my usual self.

He says

“ It’s not the way you behave it’s the fact I can see you low and I can’t really help you. I don’t know how to ”.

  • Manics

Jamie doesn’t like the risky behaviour in this episode, he feels for my safety. He forgives my behaviour, but struggles with the worry
He mentions again about the not thinking of the consequences.

He says

“ Other than the them couple of negatives, Its really not that bad, if you can take time out, to get to know the bipolar sufferer. I disregarded all the episodes because I know they aren’t sarah, it’s just her illness”
She is a very kind hearted person. I have to do things for her and make sure she looks after herself, but that’s what love is. You just have to take the positives, with the negatives like you do in any relationships. Nobody is perfect. Sarah has to deal with negatives from me also”

So there you go guys that’s my partner’s outlook on loving someone with bipolar. Hope you enjoyed the read.

Please continue to comment, if you feel strongly about any topic. As you can see I always reply to them, I will continue to do so. A big shout out to my returning readers, you are the reason I keep posting, so thank you. A thank you to all my new readers too.

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